burrito challenge.

8 Mar

Yesterday was a fateful day in the life of Judge Klausner’s four externs.

One unique thing about this externship–and these chambers in general–is there are a few unique traditions in the externship. First, the Judge is obsessed with baked goods. One of the clerks, Tiffany, got in touch with me before our first day, and suggested all of the externs bring in baked goods on our very first day. (I made my favorite Chocolate Chocolate Chip Cookies from Cupcakes and Cashmere). Side note: absolutely love her blog – it has definitely gotten better with time.

In addition to the Judge’s penchant for baked goods, each semester the chambers holds a “bake-off.” Ours is next week, is St. Patty’s Day themed, and has a Current Extern and an Alumni division. We’ll see how this goes.

The last tradition the Judge has implemented–for the last 8 years–is the “Burrito Challenge.” On a random day, the clerks and Judge announce we are going to lunch, and we are forced to eat these MASSIVE burritos in order to become inducted into the “Burrito Club” and get a sticker to put on our ID badges. The real reason we want to be in the club is for pride purposes, but also when we end our time at the externship we have to turn in our badges. No one wants to be the poor, sticker-less sap on the former extern wall.

We all had a sneaking suspicion that yesterday was going to be burrito day. Tiffany had hyped up the burrito to us the previous week – recounting the “swirling meat” and “wet tortilla.” Before lunch, we had all taken bets about whether or not yesterday was the day. At 11:30, the clerks, secretary, and the Judge show up at our office and say “ok, are you guys ready for burritos?” Game on.

We arrived at the Pacific Market. This place seemed jank at best. When we sat down, the waitress told us that unfortunately they were out of the meat they use for the burritos. That seemed super weird – but the place was really just that sketch. We all ordered randomly off the menu. Since I didn’t think I’d have to eat a gigantic burrito, I nibbled on the appetizer bread and fruit that was brought out. Okay, I gorged on it. Whoops. I should have known something was up when the secretary, the Judge and the clerks all received their food before any of the externs (and the Judge’s son, Scott, who elected to try and become a member of the Burrito Club that day as well). Sure enough, out come 5 incredibly large burritos we had to finish in one sitting. This ain’t no Chipotle – I’m talking HUGE. I was able to get through it in about 20 minutes. I was the last extern to finish and contemplated quitting more than once.

#NeverEatingAgain

#NeverEatingAgain

The rest of the afternoon we were all wrecks. I felt drunk from about 1-3, and food coma-y until we left at 5. Going to the gym was not happening, so I drove home and went on a 4 mile speed walk, by myself, at night. True signs of a crazy person. My first “meal” was a small smoothie today for lunch, and I am STILL full. I joke about how I say I’m Never Eating Again after every meal, but I think I have consumed enough calories to probably last for the rest of my life.

At least now I’m an official member of Judge Klausner’s club…

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